Do you have someone to thank or someone who helped you when your in need? If yes, do you think you have paid that debt of gratitude or return the favor to them, or you think you haven't fully paid their kindness?
In this article, we will talk about the debt of gratitude or 'utang na loob."
The essence of "utang na loob" is an obligation to properly repay a person who's done one a favor.
For example,
When someone helped you get into a job you were applying for.
When someone loaned you money when you were short on finances.
This person served as your confidant and fortress at a time of weakness.
This person did not leave you when you were going through a very difficult time.
These are examples of debt of gratitude, or "utang na loob" as we call it.
Expressing gratitude may be hard for some of us because there are times when we feel embarrassed and uncomfortable about it. This is because we feel like we are causing harm or inconvenience to them, or we can't seem to accept the fact that we are actually asking help from other people.
One way or another, there comes a time in our life that we need someone's help whether financially or emotionally. So in return, we have to do something for them or return the favor. But we really can't equate or it is hard for us to tell that we have already paid back the favor that one's have given us. Because returning the favor cannot be determined by the price or token you have given them.
Returning the favor or repaying a debt of gratitude is a sign not of weakness. It is not a sign that we are less valuable than other people either. It is only a way for us to show the people who have helped us how much we appreciate them. It is also a way for us to show them respect by acknowledging them and their efforts.
So what will you do to really payout the debt of gratitude?
Keep it simple
When we say "keep it simple", do not overthink on how we can repay that debt. We have this wrong notion that for us to return the favor of kindness, we have to treat them to a nice restaurant or give them expensive gifts. Don't overthink. The best thing that we can do is to show them that we are sincere. Show them that we are really grateful and appreciative of their kindness. Sincere words are more than enough and powerful.
Make an effort
Making an effort to say thank you is a big YES. Especially nowadays that saying thank you to someone is just a click away. But for us to really be sincere in showing our gratitude is to make an effort, not just through text, email, or call. We have to personally tell them how grateful we are by going to their place, especially if they live far from your home. They can feel that you are really sincere.
You may also try writing a letter, creating D.I.Y. gifts. The bottom line is to make it more personal. Not many people will do this, probably because of laziness. A lot of people just want the fast and easy way, even when it comes to saying thank you.
Give a gift
If you really want to give a token, no problem with that. I am sure the person you want to give it to will appreciate it, for as long as it comes from your heart. For example, cooking their favorite dish and personally bring it to them. I'm sure they will surely love it. Like I have said, it doesn't have to be expensive. Making it personal means you are sincere and proved that you have remembered them.
Return the favor
If someone did something nice to you, you have to return the favor by doing something nice to them. Let's not turn a blind eye to things like these. I am not generalizing but there are people who after receiving the favor, would forget everything as if nothing happened. That is not a nice thing to do to persons who have helped you. And if you will need help again, they would probably not help, that's for sure.
So, always find time to ask them how they are, and ask them "How can I be of help?" Or say something like, "If you need anything, just let me know."
Pay it forward
There are times that there is someone who help us but we cannot return the favor because they already passed away. Someone who help us in school or someone who believes in you. Pay it forward means be a blessing to others. It's a great feeling that we are blessed with nice and kind people who were here for us when were in need. Now, there is no reason for us to be selfish with this kind of blessing when it comes to people who are in need. When other people like our family, friends, or even stranger, are in need, let's be a blessing in the way that other people have become a blessing to us.
Share what you can to others, and you'll be blessed with more.
Think. Reflect. Apply
Ask yourself,
What was it that the person you owe some debt of gratitude to did for you?
Have you shown your appreciation and thanks to this person? Or did you just let the moment pass you by?
How can you possibly return the favour to this person?
With these, you will know what to do in order for you to pay back the debt of gratitude. No matter what method you use, either paying it forward to other people or showing them how appreciative you are, DO IT NOW. Don't wait for the moment that they will ask you to pay them back. Make an effort.
Thank you for reading!
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For me po, most of the time or before po, i say thank u n kng my xtra o sobra po aq, i give gifts po aside from saying thanks po