Why do women always do this?

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Avatar for Kushyzee
2 years ago

The topic I am about to talk about doesn't actually apply to all women, it's just something I have observed with a lot of ladies in my country. Ok, this topic was inspired by a thread I came across on nairaland and I think I will just have to start with that so you will know where I am coming from.

A lady made a post earlier today on nairaland with the title: Why Are Men Uninterested Nowadays and I knew it is going to be interesting. According to her, she's 33 years old and ready to settle down with a man. She has a good career, a startup in the make-up industry, is humble, appreciative, blah blah blah, and all other qualities.

She got linked to a guy that recently got back from the US and she found him to be respectful, successful, and also had the intention of settling down just like her. They went out on a date and apparently, she later discovered that she was throwing herself at him and it was very embarrassing for her, so what did she do? She ghosted him!

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She withdrew and decided to form busy by not responding to his texts and calls for over two days! According to her, she did that so it won't be like she was desperate for his attention but it seems she didn't know what it will look like to the guy because he finally stopped calling or texting her, and now she's regretting the whole thing. I mean, what else does she want him to do after ghosting him for over two days?!

You are already 33 years old but still want to be playing the same mind game she did in her 20s, and now she's wondering why she's not yet married meanwhile she has been chasing men away with her attitude. Why will anybody think it's cool to ignore a person that's interested in you for over 2 days and still expect them to keep chasing you?

That's the thing that a lot of ladies do in my country; "the hard-to-get technique". When I asked some ladies why they do that, they said it's because they want the man to work for it and earn their love so he wouldn't take them for granted, but that's some major bullsh*t! Most of them still end up being taken for granted even when a guy chases them for 2 years.

A lady will have a crush on a guy and luckily for her, the universe is on her side and the guy finally approaches her and she finds out he is also interested in her, and boom! She activates her security lock and wants the guy to keep guessing the password to unlock her heart, and then she gets angry when the guy stops trying.

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Sometimes it even gets worse for some of them as the man that is chasing them may end up dating their friend. I remember a case some years back, one of my friends was trying to get a lady to go on a date with him and she was playing hard to get. He couldn't stress himself much so he left her and approached her friend, the friend agreed! The other lady was furious! πŸ˜‚

You didn't want something, why get angry when someone else who sees the worth end up with that same thing? Now my friend and the lady's friend are engaged after dating for several years, it's the other lady's loss after all. Someone once told me that whenever a lady declines a guy's advances and her friend suddenly starts dating the same guy, she too becomes interested and starts getting jealous, and from what I have observed it's true in most cases.

What's wrong with just going after what you want without playing mind games? A lot of guys these days no longer have time to chase after a girl, once they notice you're playing hard to get, they move on to the next girl. Honestly, I find it demeaning to be chasing after a girl for several months and she keeps ignoring you sometimes and only gives you attention when she wants, people that do that are referred to as simps.

I only call someone twice unless it's an emergency. If it's a girl I am interested in, I call twice and if she doesn't pick up or doesn't call back, then she can forget about it. I know my worth and I am not going to belittle myself to the level of making someone a priority when they only see me as an option, and that's what a lot of these ladies do, they want a man to treat them like a queen meanwhile they treat him like a slave, shouldn't it be reciprocal?

The lady that made that post on nairaland must have been really shocked for her to have brought the issue to a public forum, she probably thought the young man is going to keep calling and continue chasing her even when she's taking him for granted, he obviously has too much respect for himself to not play by her mind games, and I believe that's what any man with high self-esteem should do in such situation.

Thanks for reading πŸ’–πŸ’–πŸ’–

Saturday May 14, 2022

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2 years ago

Comments

Why is she shocked, she's receiving a dose of the treatment she dished out when she was in her prime. This is onw of the major reasons why I'm still single till date. Like I don't have the strength to be chasing anybody's daughter around, or try to convince anybody to love you in return. That's bullsh!t. I let it flow naturally, if it ain't working, then so be it. By the way, I love nairaland so muchπŸ˜‚. A very interesting faceless forum.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

That's exactly my view as well, if it's meant to be then it will flow naturally. I have never chased any girl in my life and a the relationships I have been in just happened naturally

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Being a woman, sometimes we act opposite to our emotions and there's a moment that we can realize in a little bet late

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Lol, I guess men will never understand why women behave the way they do

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2 years ago

I also experienced that kind of situation yung gusto mo lang ng atensyon sa isang guy tapos sinayang mo lahat efforts nya den pag wala na saka mo nalang maisip ang worth nya

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2 years ago

I just most of those ladies don't know what they want, they would literally see the person that love them and give them all attentions needed but they brain will just re direct them to someone that doesn't give a sh*t about them

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2 years ago

Some guys actually said that most women don't like nice guys, they prefer a guy that doesn't show care and have bad boy vibes πŸ˜†

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2 years ago

Ok, being a lady too, I would say playing hard to get is not really because the lady is proud but just not to look too cheap. I know of a sister that accepted for a guy almost immediately the guy asked her out and the guy's friends told him to quit the relationship that the girl is not a wife material and she's too cheap. So what exactly do men want?πŸ˜‚

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Lol, everyone isn't exactly the same and the guy is too immature to have listened to his friends, a relationship is meant for two people and isn't supposed to be a community project. I have also seen cases where the girl accepted the guy immediately and they remained together for long

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2 years ago

Hmm.. but you know everyone doesn't think the way you do

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2 years ago

It's also not everyone that thinks a girl that accepted easily is cheap, it goes both ways

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2 years ago

This topic is a bomb and I wish enough of our ladies here will see this 🧐. Playing hard to get is normal and I think it's in their Gene but its excessive is the problem. It was before I used to cling on calling and texting to get attention even in the misdt of snob, but now once you give a slight symptom of snob, I pack my load and go. I don't have strength for too many talks

$ 0.02
2 years ago

That's exactly the point I am try to make, it's ok to play hard to get but some girls just don't know when it has gotten excessive. Imagine snubbing someone for over two days all because you want to form hard to get, na foolishness be that

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2 years ago

You wan play hard to get, na for hook up πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. When no be say the guy see you for road or outside dey woo you. Orisirisi

$ 0.02
2 years ago

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Dem think say guys get their time these days

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2 years ago

I think most ladies are trying to form that they are hard to get 😁😁. In the olden days, you gotta do small shakara before you say yes to the guy😁😁. But I do not like the idea of ignoring your partner or something...

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Small shakara is fine, but ignoring the person for days is not sensible at all

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2 years ago

Using the (hard-to-get) strategy is not a good thing since a lady or woman might use it to sway her future husband away. Ladies simply need to be aware of what they do so that they do not have to blame themselves like the woman you stated.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

I believe there should be a balance to appearing cheap and acting hard to get. Some ladies us the hard to get technique to flter out who's really serious, but most of them do it too much and end up chasing away their admirer

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2 years ago

Building our walls higher is much better for us women, I really admired women who's hard to get and really don't let their walls down to a man, and independent woman indeed, but nowadays I see women easy to get gosh or maybe just they love the person, but yeah women have different perspectives about this.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

It doesn't make sense to build a wall against a person you like, why ignore a person you want because the society says so? I admire women who open up on what they want, some that play hard to get still end up with a cheater, so what's the point?

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2 years ago

It's different when they already experience a heart break, also when their mindset is not about having men to their life, they built higher walls for them and standards not because society tells them to but because they wanted. I didn't mean say that built walls to the person they like of course you need to be open if you are entering a relationship.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Building a wall if you're not interested in the person is fine, but the one I am talking about is building a wall when you know you like the person, that's what most girls do in my country and it just doesn't make sense

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2 years ago

Oh yeah, Maybe because they are afraid or have their traumas about their past relationships haha or maybe they just so oa and sometimes men get tired on courting women women who's hard to get, I've seen a lot of girls like this in my country too haha.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Hmmm, I guess you're right

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2 years ago

I laughed a lot when I read it :))) Man, women are the same all over the world. Is this possible? Yes, unfortunatelyg. I experienced almost exactly the same thing. I did not receive a response to my calls for almost 10 days. Moreover, a woman I've been seeing for a long time did this. Then she contacted me and when I said I didn't want to meet anymore she tried very hard to get me back. This woman is 32 years old. Women think they are smart by making little games like this. But they don't realize that they look so stupid and lose value. This is sheer nonsense :)))

$ 0.02
2 years ago

It's really a sick behavior when some of them behave that way and they say they are doing it so the man will truly desire them, it's a huge turn off for most men

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2 years ago

Right from the time of our mothers, it's part of courtship and biological for a woman to play hard to get at first, although different women have their reasons. A man might think a girl is cheap when she readily agrees to date him on the first toast. It might also be that a guy might change his mind afterall when he sees that the girl is easy to woo and therefore may be more prone to cheating when they finally kick off the relationship. Some guys see this as a motivation to get to know a lady better. But for others, well I think the stresses of being a Nigerian is enough for them and they are not ready to stress themselves more on chasing a woman where you could easily get another one within minimal effort.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Nothing is certain in this life and there are no rules when it comes to relationships. Fine, it's good to play hard to get and honestly some men even enjoy the chase, but it shouldn't be to the extent where you will act completely uninterested and still want the person to continue chasing you. Most girls that play hard to get still get their heart broken, so what's the whole point of it if it doesn't guarantee a successful relationship?

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2 years ago

That's true. Q thirty three year old lady shouldn't have the time for long games.. but it was just two days nau just like it was stated in the article. They guy really mean business fa 😭

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2 years ago

πŸ˜‚ if you're texting and calling someone for two days without responds, you go continue? The guy even try, if it's me I will do it for just a day and japa

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2 years ago

I think women who are hurt deeply once become so scared of staring a deep relationship again.. because you know how it is too hard to trust again because going through the hurt again feels like death.. maybe the lady in the story was scared about being committed to the guy

$ 0.02
2 years ago

It's ok to be scared but it isn't cool to ignore a person for over two days, the young man has been texting and calling and she ignored him completely

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2 years ago

Hahaha, that's the beauty of courting a lady. But it seems men nowadays are short on patience.

$ 0.03
2 years ago

πŸ˜‚ that's what I have noticed as well, the normnis gradually changing

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2 years ago

Really everyone does wants young boy or girl. Tbh i also want young pretty girls πŸ₯΄

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Omo, what she did in her 20s, she's still doing it to play hard, later you will see them in Shiloh with people pictures or praying to marry them, and once the person comes, they will be acting like they never prayed for it. What do women actually want? πŸ˜‚

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2 years ago

Guy the matter just tire me. She's still busy playing games while she's getting older, instead of her to use now to apply wisdom

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2 years ago

Bro you should already know women are complex creatures you can never understand them so just try to be navigating anyhow the one you can grab use it the one you don’t understand just move on

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Aswear bro, women defiles logic and most logical things you think might work will just backfire πŸ˜†

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2 years ago

All I can say is that "E go shock them!". It's good for a woman to be classy but when it carries disregard and ego, it isn't nice. Life's stress is too much already to be fucking with people's minds.

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2 years ago

Exactly, but they will rather stress someone's son to fight for their love because they feel they are the best thing after slice bread

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2 years ago

Hehehehe..

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2 years ago

Haha I am a woman and I know some really are into that . It is because they believe that if the guy is really serious, he would still.pursue her. They wanted to see effort, hehe. Though every woman have different point of views, others even wanted long courship.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

I understand that some would love to see effort and know if the guy is serious, but some of those attitude are a bit extreme and a total turnoff most times

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2 years ago

Haha well maybe as courtship now was bit different compare before.. or maybe just simply have different perspective when it comes to itπŸ˜‚

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2 years ago

I really don't know who told them that's a,way to measure or prove their worth whatsoever

$ 0.02
2 years ago

I just tire, some of them still end up being taken for granted even after the long game

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2 years ago

If you are praying to God for a husband, he wouldn't come down to give you a husband. He will send someone and it is left to you to handle the rest.

Age doesn't require you to jump at every man but it is a big mistake to start forming an attitude when she knows the guy is perfect for her.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

I actually understand that some wouldn't want to seem desperate but ignoring someone for over 2 days is a bit extreme

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2 years ago

You are right, she went too far to prove nothing.

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2 years ago