Deceit vs relationships

Lead image credit: People photo created by wayhomestudio - freepik.com

I slept very late last night (around 3am) even though I was very tired. I trekked for about one hour to and from school, and the reason was that the normal route I usually take which is about a 15 minutes walk was blocked.

I don't know how some sets of persons will have the guts to lock the back gate of a federal university, but that's a story for another day.

I woke up around 6am which has now become a normal routine and after checking out a few articles on this platform, I hopped on to nairaland as usual

Relationship and deceit

I saw an article while going through nairaland about a woman who moved into a new home with her boyfriend but unknown to the boyfriend she is the owner of the house and he pays rent to her. (You can read the original article here).

She announced it on a TikTok video and it has gotten mixed reactions from the public. Some people supported her and said she's only securing her future and she's doing the right thing. That's sick

People will certainly find a way to justify something wrong. She's just being selfish and unsupportive and I see no reason why she did something like that.

I don't know about you but the conclusion I arrived at is that she doesn't see herself building a future with her boyfriend. She might see the relationship as an investment and looking to make lots of profit from it.

When the article was posted on nairaland, I knew it will turn into a gender war. On one side we have the modern feminists, and on the other side, we have the alpha males (redpillers).

Basically, on nairaland, there's this usual mentality among some of the males that all Nigerian females are the worst. They praise foreign women and always say they will rather date them to have peace of mind.

But this recent development now has a twist, here is a foreign woman doing something that is normally attributed to Nigerian women. The alpha males have gone into hiding and the few of them that are seen trying to play defense are being dragged in the mud 😅.

Despite the ongoing war, some persons made some reasonable comments. Someone asked how it will sound if the woman was the victim.

Sure, sometimes we have situations where a man and his girlfriend are staying together and she's paying the bills, what then happens if the man suddenly reveals on social media that he is the landlord and has been collecting rent from his girlfriend?

The same persons that are supporting this lady now will be the ones to call for his head. They won't call it being "smart" anymore, because the woman is now the victim. But it's all cool if she's the one doing it to someone else.

Then at last I saw a comment that mirrors what I was thinking at that point;

This could all be a publicity stunt. The lady might be chasing clout and she's getting the attention. The video she posted has gotten 1.3 million views since last Thursday (I don't know the current number right now, but I'm expecting it to be more than that).

We have all seen cases of this before when someone goes on social media and drops a fabricated story. The thing is most people on social media like this sort of thing. They love to gossip and she clearly knows how to get attention.

But does that mean something like this doesn't happen? Of course, it does. I remembered seeing a case like that on the same nairaland two years ago.

This time around, it happened to a married couple in Nigeria but the husband caught up with her. I have forgotten most of the details but the house the family was renting is owned by the wife and the husband pays rent to her without knowing.

The painful thing is that the wife collects money from the husband for virtually everything that goes on in the house. She doesn't spend her money on anything and still collects rent from him yearly. Is that not evil?

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There's still another case where the wife always complains that she earns little income from her work so she always collects money from her husband. They were staying in a little apartment where they manage to live comfortably.

The man earns enough to take care of his family, but he wasn't anywhere rich. He gets little to no support from the wife because he believes she earns little income from her job until he saw a text message on her phone one day.

She was in the bathroom when the text message arrived, the husband took a glance at it and saw it was a credit alert. He looked closely at it and noticed it was her salary. He was curious so he opened the text, he couldn't believe what he saw.

She earns a lot more than what she claimed and her salary was three times more than his. He also noticed that she regularly sends money to her dad.

At that point, he became suspicious and decided to check her Whatsapp messages to see what else she is hiding. Long story short, she has been sending money to her dad to build a house. She has also been sending money to her brother to fund his business, all while her family suffers.

The man was really confused and depressed that he brought the issue to nairaland to seek a solution on if to confront the wife or to just let things slide and see if she will tell him later.

`Image credit: Wedding photo created by freepik - freepik.com

@George_Dee did an article with a similar scenario but this time around, it's infidelity. Should she tell her husband about the child in her womb that belongs to another man or will you advise her to abort it to save her marriage? Read more about it; Left with No Choice and feel free to drop your opinion.

The article by George_dee reminded me of another pressing issue that has been trending lately;

Paternity fraud

A man carries out a DNA test on all his kids and discovers they are not his. That's one of the saddest things you can come across.

This issue has been going on for a long time but it has recently started getting more attention as a lot of persons are now open to the idea of carrying out a DNA test on their children.

I think what made it popular was the sex scandal of the managing director (MD) of First City Monument Bank (FCMB). Let me drop a summary I got from the petition submitted on change.org

Tunde Thomas died recently like about a week or 2 from Depression. Apparently, kids from his marriage to Moyo Thomas belongs to wife’s boss (the current MD of FCMB). Moyo Thomas left Tunde to go to America with the kids, she told him the kids were not his when she got to America. He was later down with stroke but recovered.

You can read the remaining story from the website.

The infidelity of the wife, Moyo Thomas, led to the depression and subsequent death of the husband, Tunde Thomas. She traveled to America with the kids where she later broke the news to him that the children belong to her boss, the MD of FCMB.

After the death of Tunde, a lot of persons started taking paternity fraud seriously and a lot of DNA tests were done. Homes were destroyed after husbands discovered that the children aren't theirs.

Just last week, I came across 2 cases of paternity fraud, and more keeps coming out every day. This just goes to show the rot in our society and the deceit that goes on in relationships.

I don't know why people find joy in deceiving others and causing emotional harm to them. It's obvious that things like these occur everywhere and every day, but we are only starting to notice recently.

People now see relationships as a game; a mind game. Husbands play on wives and wives play on husbands, the "smartest" person is considered the winner. Relationships are no longer about love but it's now based on how smart you are.

It's truly scary but it's still comforting to know that there are good people out there and not everyone is part of the whole deceitful relationship craze.

Although good people are now difficult to find, we all should also do our part by doing the right thing and be good to your respective partner.

Thanks for reading 💗💗💗

September 8th, 2021