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I'm sitting on a bench outside the mall, alone but not lonely. I'm waiting for someone I have no idea when he'll arrive. It got me thinking about the good and bad decisions I've made in my life that have led me here.
I've met this man. A tough man who hides his pain behind his sharp-looking chinky eyes to shield his feelings and vulnerability. On the outside, he seems cold-hearted, but this is his defense mechanism to guard his shattered heart he got from all the battles he had been through.
I had no idea that inside him is just a kid with a wide imagination who likes to paint but is colorblind. But then we met, and a stroke of luck happened. He took up his paintbrush again and painted my monotonous world of black and white with vibrant colors I'd never seen in my life.
I'm a mediocre. An average. Things can be done well but never perfectly. That's all I think about myself, but he showed me that I'm more. He motivated me to gather up my pen again and write some pieces that I couldn't fathom myself doing. Made me think that I'm actually good.
I've never noticed him creeping deeper into the world I've created for myself. I expected him to be in the corner of my crust like a stranger I bumped somewhere and then forget about his face after a few hours.
As he incrementally inflicts my mantle on his way to the core, here I am, incrementally unlocking every rusty door I haven't unlocked in a long time. I tried to suppress my feelings for him to make things easier, but the more I did it, the stronger it became.
I'm afraid I'm going to hurt him. I have no control over the demons within me, which is guarded by a vast maze and flying dementors, that sucks every wonderful memory of anyone who tries to enter. But then he said, "Your demons are stronger but my love for you is greater than them.." and I let him in.
It's not easy fighting those monsters. We sometimes fall back to square one, but he always helps me get back up and make every fall as safe as he promised.
I know that in the long run, we will face more obstacles in life that may tear us apart, but I trust that his love for me is stronger than that.
"Sorry. Did you wait too long, baby?" a sweet voice interrupted my reverie.
"I've been here for over two hours! What took you so long?" I fumed.
"I got stuck in traffic. Come on! You're too beautiful when you're upset, but even more so when you're smiling. Gosh! My wife is too gorgeous!" He said, smiling widely.
"You simp," I grumbled, trying not to smile.
"I know you're hungry, so let's get something to eat before we tackle this grocery list, okay? I left the kids with my mom, but we'll pick them up after our date, so don't worry about them Hmm?"
I smiled, and we walked hand in hand, as if we were an unmarried couple on a date in broad daylight.