10 August 2021, Somewhere in the Metaverse - UplandDood (@Just1Dood)
Yes, that would be my reaction if I were to read my own poems. It's so bad that it needs to be detonated. Detonate? Defused? Or thrown into the deep blue sea? Let's see.
Still, I think some are so bad, they're good. Don't take my word for it. I'm biased that way. Let me prove it to you through some of these self-made poems. I was really playing with fire there. Poems are dangerous to play with without proper training. It can do lots of damage if not handled delicately. I'm not a delicate person. I'm crude. Obnoxious. An introverted live wire. LOL. See how dangerous that can be?
Detonating Poems
Alright as promised, here are some Poems to prove my point. Please wear the necessary protection and do stand beyond the red danger line behind the plexiglass 500 meters away.
Though these poems are generally safe, as I'd tested them before to see how much noise they create (see the clever reference to noise.cash there? Yeah, baby. A pat in the back there for Austin. Caught the reference? It's an easter egg. LOL.)
I don't recall how it all started. It could have been that I'd read a few writer's poems and thought, why can't I do that? It could also be due to @Samantha-Smith telling me that I could do it.
I know I'll never be at their level but I can be at my goofy level. That led to the birth of this first rhyme on 21 July 2021. It was originally posted here. You'll have to go there to see the full post.
Here's the inaugural UplandDood poem:
Title: I need tips on how to rhyme ;-) ;-)
I read to be hip,
And I post to get tips,
I will do a flip,
If you send me tips!
From then on, it was too late. The fuse has been lit. There was no containing it. That led to the second poem on the same day!
Title: A Rhyme a Dime
I do my best to rhyme,
But it's not a crime,
If my brain decline
to be so inclined?
You can see the full post here.
Making poems was so addictive that immediately on the next day, 22 July 2021, another one was created after a hearty meal of Pizzas! Full details here.
Title: The Pizza Rhyme
Pizza for the famished
Slices soon will vanish
As always I will finish
Seven boxes, mission accomplished!
It was a little forced in making that one. Glad it didn't explode.
After surviving the above unscathed, I proceeded to assemble another one. This one was loaded with caffeine. Yes, done on the same day. Here's the proof.
Title: It's coffee time
Not enough coffee,
I'll feel fluffy.
Too much for me,
It'll taste like pee!
There was a long break after the above attempt. I wondered if it has something to do with the caffeine. Inspiration hit for the next one on 27 July 2021. The full message is here. It's about Pizza again, what else? I love pizzas.
Title: Ordering Pizza Rhyme
When you call for Pizza,
Remember it's not Jabba.
The hint is in the Hut,
Make sure it doesn't rhyme with Butt!
The inspiration wasn't enough to make a convincing one. It was forced fitted. Lol.
There was silence after that. Was the poem maker still around? It's awfully quiet. In fact, there was another bigger, more potent poem was made but I'll leave that out for now. I'll talk about that in the next article.
Meanwhile, let's end with this one. It was on 2 August 2021, and I had difficulty sleeping and I thought to myself, "Why not make a poem then?" and I did.
Here's the result of that (I'd since edited the grammatical error in this one).
Title: Bedtime nonsense rhyme
Too many chips
Before I sleep.
Dreamt of ships
Sailing on shit.
I wish I have an image for that but I can't find any in unsplash.com. You'll just have to use your imagination. Got it? Good. Betcha it's gonna be difficult to unthink that image now. LOL.
New Additions
As you know, I review my articles before I post them (FYI, this article was written at least a week ago). The following two rhymes were written after that.
I'm adding them below. One reason is an easy reference for myself. :-) If you want to read the original post, click on the title name. I usually make some comments in those posts.
Title: I am a Stick
I am a stick,
don't call me Dick.
I could be Nick,
And be a prick!
Here's the second one. A 4-word rhyme! Hahaha..
Title: Cycle of Life
Daytime;
Mealtime.
Nighttime;
Bedtime!
Poems Defused
For unknown reasons, poems were something I was afraid to attempt. But I am glad I had taken the plunge with that first one. If it was not for noise.cash, I probably wouldn't have discovered the challenge and thrill associated with the assembly of a poem.
Thank you for enduring these few poems. You survived. More impressively, I survived. I think. LOL. Should be able to tell once the comments come flooding in or maybe not.
Oh, in case you're wondering why this is a 2nd in a series, here's the first. It was published yesterday - An Odd Ode: To my Sponsors - Current & To-be.
Stay safe and see you in the next article.
Sources:
Header Image by Amber Avalona from Pixabay
Image 1 by b1-foto from Pixabay
Thank you again for dropping by. Have fun with English. Remember to share your experience in the comment section.
Do drop by to say hi at my following addresses. I promise I'll be at home :)
NoiseCash: UplandDood
Twitter: UplandDood
Publish0x: UplandDood (link takes you to site. You'll have to search for UplandDood to find me)
...and you will also help the author collect more tips.
You poems are not actually detonators. Truly speaking, i shall apprentice you for these poems. You have enough courage to do whatever you want despite of not knowing how to do it. And one day, the true poet that reside inside you shall come out and shall win heart of everyone.