3-12-21 Random Thoughts and Musings

Hi Diary, I really haven’t pushed up my writing here as of yet. I am still hesitant because I am not sure which topics will generate the most. Some would say, I shouldn’t write for pay but thing is, I need it! LOL And that’s the main reason I am here, is to generate myself enough income regularly so that I can finally be financially free and get rid of those pesky little bills that come in monthly. LOL. I pray that before this year is over, the only bill that will be coming through my email and doorstep will be that of utility bills which I am also trying to minimize as I would like to make my house fully solar powered. That’s a dream I hope to achieve real soon. I know I can do it. I just need a little push. So how do you push yourself when you feel like there’s so many things pulling you down? How do you motivate yourself when you feel like everything and everyone is ganging up against you, even those you thought were your side, seems to be going the other way. I don’t want to be discouraged or disheartened but sometimes it gets to me and I feel down. So what do you think is my best solution to this dilemma? I’m really a very emotional person so every strike is a big hit for me... I’m trying to change but its not as easy as it seems. So here I am still struggling, still pushing, still trying, still fighting but I’m not sure how much more of a fight I’ve got left in me...