I had something different in mind for today's article but I came across a story that made me change my article. I love to talk to people a lot and some neighbors at the farm are fond of sharing true life experiences with me just for talking sake and some tell things to seek advice. I still really don't know why people feel very comfortable sharing their stories with me, I find it very cool because I learn from their stories as well.
What is in the past is indeed in the past but the past is not a bygone as many of us have claimed because the things we did in the past can reoccur in the future, this made me concluded that there are some things from the past that must never be forgotten no matter how comfortable or how bad things get for us.
A man caught his wife with something that has to do with betraying trust in their relationship, they have been together for some time now. He was careful with details because he was holding back some information but it doesn't really matter since I understood everything he was trying to explain to me.
It wasn't the first time she was doing such a thing, they have quarreled over it times without number, argued on different occasions before but along the line, he stopped paying attention to it hoping that she would change but he was wrong. All this while, he thought it was over but she was been smart about how she does the same old habit of hers.
What made him sad was the fact she wouldn't learn from how the repercussion of the things she did in past almost ruined their relationship which he didn't take to heart and he feels like she didn't value their relationship.
For the first time in a long time, I didn't know what to say to him as a piece of advice because the first thing that came to my mind was that "would I have taken what she was doing to him if I was in his shoes?". My answer would be NO but I can't tell him because I don't want to be the reason why his relationship would crash.
I always knew people are difficult to change but I don't understand why because their past should be enough reason for them to quit some or all of these bad acts or are they always quick to forget the things that happened in the past?
I said earlier that it wouldn't be proper for us to treat the past as a bygone and I have reasons for saying that, you might be interested to know so read along with me.
Experience and Lessons from the past must live it us forever.
We all understand that experience is the greatest teacher when talking about life matters, it is the same as saying that the past is the greatest teacher because the things that happened in the past are lessons that must be held on to as we journey through life.
One or two lessons out of the things we have experienced in life will have a role to play in our future but many of us do not understand that, it is the more reason why people commit one mistake twice and even more in life.
I am not exempted from this as well because I remembered been accused of snatching another man's wife twice because I rendered help after knowing what the husband was making them go through. It was God intervention that cleared me off the issue on the two occasions.
The mistake I made was sending money directly to them but now, I do transfer to the nearest POS shop of the receiver to avoid stories when it involves a woman.
I believe that those things that happened in the past occurred just to prevent us from something bigger in the future but what happens when we have thrashed those lessons? We will eventually fall victim to that same problem again and again until we learn to hold on to the lessons of the past.
It is possible for you not to need those lessons for yourself again but you can still use it as a guide for younger ones who look up to you for advice.
There is a Yoruba adage that says " Iriri lagba" and it means that your experience can make you a wise man or woman. You can help people make a proper decision in life with the experience you have in life.
There are people from the past that mustn't be forgotten.
This is another important reason why we mustn't forget the past, some people have gone out of their convenience just to help us in life and I believe that they mustn't be forgotten.
I remember during my junior school graduation, I had nothing to wear because my clothes were old and I knew it would be embarrassing for me to go there looking terrible because it has become a tradition for me to get a prize every year.
After all effort to get me a new dress failed, my mom told me that I won't be attending the school party and I wept bitterly.
An elder in my church was passing past, he saw me and asked what happened, I explained everything to him. He told me not to worry, he reached for his purse and gave me a thousand five hundred naira. I got a second hand cloth and was able to attend the event, the help he rendered me has remained something I cherish so much and I didn't forget the man because of that, he is reaping his good deed till today because I took him as a father.
Despite the cruelty humanity has exhibited in recent years, I can confidently say that there are still good humans among us that would help us even without knowing us from Adam. These people shouldn't be forgotten and I believe that there are numerous ways we can pay back their kindness if we don't dispose the memories of good things they did for us.
What I observe is that people sometimes get too excited or comfortable with what they have achieved or become in life and it makes them forget the past so soon.
A day's enjoyment can indeed make us forget 10 years of hardship and we can quickly fall from grace to grass if we don't hold on to the knowledge/lessons the past has taught us.
I do believe that past is just a scene we must not think of let's forget it but not the lesson we get from it. Because we will use it t be better and wiser