As I was rounding up my speech at a conference last night in a faraway city in the northern part of my country, my phone vibrated with a notification of a message from my wife. Her message was short and straight to the point "Hello darling, are you still busy, I want to chat with you now". I wanted to ignore the message as I was really damn exhausted. But while bowing my head as I took my seat to catch some breath a word flashed through my mind.
True to it, I have had some moments where I needed to take a break and ask myself if I really know what matters In life, how am living my life, and if I'm living up to expectations for my family. Making a living seems so paramount but I must check if am "too busy making a living without living the life".
Since I moved to a new station, I have made a lot of changes to my lifestyle. I used to have a strong passion for outside business more than I do for my family business which has seen me leaving home early and returning late almost every day. This means I only have two to three hours for my family daily except on weekends. Right now, in my new station, I'm not as focused on building a business empire outside my home. Am getting back to the realms of realities and what really matters in life. Am getting back my voice as a husband and a father. And thankfully, writing on read.cash has been able to allow me to live with my family in a way that makes it easier for me to spend quality time with my children daily. I got to see how they play, how they study, and be available to answer their questions which before now their mother was doing alone. And thank God, for the first time in as much as fifteen years I haven't been relying on the income from an outside business. And it's so refreshing, to say the least.
Nevertheless, I had to think about if I was applying the words that flashed through my mind for not wanting to chat with my wife at that moment I received her message. I started thinking about how many nights I returned home after hard day work in business being very exhausted to the point that I am not able to sit together with my family for just five minutes before going to bed. And on most weekends it's as if am not there at all, for the fact that I needed to do a catch up on my studies and prepare for Sunday meetings in the church.
I have had some odd jobs since I started as a family man 15 years ago. I started doing business 9 years ago, and since then I've never had a time am not outside doing business except for my time in ministry which is also outside my family. Honestly, I wouldn't want to stop, I enjoy doing business, and meeting new people every day. And besides, it also helps me to be able to support others who are in need. My goal was to make an impact in my area of business. Though now am no longer in business, am most satisfied for those am able to help and inspired with the business. I know God is going to meet my needs henceforth, and I going to put more effort to develop my newfound passion for writing.
But while doing that, I must listen to my convictions to know when and how much time to put into working and that of my family. I want to be there for my children always and listen to their ignorant excuses to not wanting to do a thing. Being with them helps to release them from those innocent ignorances. I don't want to look back with regret with regrets about what I failed to do While the children were younger.
Moreover, a word says to enjoy the wife of your youth. The best moments I can have with my wife are in the moment of my youthfulness. There's more strength, there's is more vigor, there's is more enthusiasm, and there's more fun in youthfulness. Our bond is getting much stronger by the day since I started working at home. She would not want to miss a moment being with me and that's exactly how I feel we well. Her message to me that triggered these thoughts lend credence to that fact.
It's kind of silly to know that I have been working to not working on what really matters. Now I started setting goals for myself and not allowing myself to be away for so much time in a day. Going out randomly visiting friends has been completely eliminated from my agenda. I have to set boundaries between the most important, the important, and the none important. Family is the most important, work is important, while random visiting of friends is none important.
Though am a minister of the gospel, yet it's difficult at times to fellowship together in prayers with family members. Fatigue and other things can come in that you just feel praying alone is coolest to save time for other things. That's not a healthy lifestyle for my type of person. Now, if am not done with work by the time I have set for the family to meet for night prayers before going to bed, I have to put that work over to the next day. Everyone goes to bed at the same time and wakes at the same time.
It's hard to break those habits that I've had for years, but I'm determined to keep things this way and pay attention to what really matters in life.
Pursuing ambition is not more important than a family. You may succeed in achieving your dreams but if you fail in your family your achievements are as good as nothing. You could have all the money you want but if you don't spend time with your family nor have time for them you labor for nothing in life. When the money is gone, it will be you alone with your family and remember you don't get young twice.
I encourage you to start today by giving your family the time they deserve. Never let your work chips into your family time. Start this weekend and stick by it. Let your computer and phones rest during dinner, and remember to shut them up to go to bed with your family without opening them till the next day. The midnight alarm can rest, the emails, SMS, and trading signals can wait until the next day.