Can I afford to start all over again?

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3 years ago

Starting all over again is not an interesting thing, and I doubt if there is anyone who likes it. But life has a way of forcing one to restart whether you like it or not. There may be a thrill in starting a new venture, but if you have spent years building something as I have done, you know the uneasy feeling you get when life makes you begin all over again. It's hard to think about it, after building something and attaining success you are closing it up to start all over again somewhere else. It's definitely hard to do. This is why some people wouldn't like to leave move out of a place or a job even when things aren't going well with them.

Being a Christian administrator, I have had to change location several times due to frequent transfers. This literally means I have to start over again on each occasion. It's much easier to do when you have nothing at stake on such occasions. You can quickly put things together with your family and bid your parish a farewell. But when you have built something like a business that has grown and become well known in the city where you served, it's quite hard to think of how to start over again considering where you have been. Two years ago I got a transfer to the city where I presently serve. And since my former station wasn't that so far from my present location, I continue my business there. I have to commute daily to continue running the business. Meanwhile, I started a new business in my present location which has since grown and is well established. That was an additional source of income for my family. But all that has come to an end abruptly.

Is this back to square zero?

I had the shocker of my life two weeks back when my leader sent me a mail informing me of a potential transfer to a new station in a new city. Can I afford to start over again after years of hard work? My wife thinks we cannot afford to do that. But am a servant, refusing a transfer would be a denial of faith. This time our new station is hundreds of kilometers far away from our present station. What this means is that I will have to close down my businesses and see if I can start over again in my new station. It's not going to be easy, and as it is now we have stopped business since receiving the transfer information to allow us to put things together and prepare for our departure to the new station.

How do I handle the new challenge?

One thing that I have with me that will continue to be useful for me going into the future is my experiences, from starting a business from scratch to failing and falling over again and again until I eventually succeeded have taught me more about success and failure. Starting over again wouldn't be a completely fresh experience. My knowledge from past experiences will be handing, and knowing what I know now means I am not starting over. We’re just beginning again. I have had some occasions to start something new over again in my early days while trying to find a business that can scale for me. Each new start comes with new challenges, but one thing that I have learned was never to quit trying. All those years were years of practicing, preparing, and waiting for my big moment. Who knows if this might be the big moment I dreamed of, it's hard to tell.

Can I do something new now?

Beginning again will always be slow and cumbersome at first, as it is like testing the depth of the river with one foot. But the things that have brought me to the level am I today made me a man with a new vision and hope beyond the horizon. Knowing my merits and demerits for what they are, embracing the unknown future with compassion in hand, could help me know what exactly I should do. I don't think of doing something new from the way I have done it in the past. If my approach to business has worked for me on a number of occasions, I chose to follow the same pattern in my new challenges. But I must not allow my emotion to get hold of me. It's really hard to let go. I will need my faith to be at its utmost right now. When things get tumultuous, I know that the storms will pass, and I have faith in myself to keep going. I know the storms will keep coming, this might not be the last transfer. But whatever comes my way, I know that there’s more strength in me now than I used to be. 

I can hear a voice inside of me saying "Don’t give up, this will be the most important investment you’ll ever make in your life"

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