@Davinchysax 30 October 2020 more from that month

How to make it work.

**Caveat:** If you are not married, please make sure you read to the last sentence and if you are married, help me to throw more light on anything that is not clearly stated or correct.   Whenever we hear about people wedding, there is always this euphoria of joy in the air, this joy is seen both in the eyes of the groom and the bride. It does not end there, this joy flows straight into both families and friends but have you noticed what happens the moment the wedding ceremony is over. You will notice that the bride and the groom will leave all the guests including their respective families and friends which mean that they have chosen to be with each other and that is when the marriage starts.   What is marriage? **M = Management** **A = Acceptance** **R = Respect** **R = Romance** **I = Interaction** **A = Agreement** **G = Goodwill** **E = Endurance.**   Marriage is the coming together of two individuals who have agreed by way of giving their consent and exchanging vows at the altar in the presence of their families and friends. But does marriage truly have a definition? I will leave you to answer that for yourself.   Let us look at the word marriage as an acronym in that way we can have a little understanding as to what marriage truly is.   ·        **Management.** The word management has a lot of roles to play in a marriage and the ability for the marriage to last sweetly. There should be a great deal of management culture in both areas of temper and economical attainment. A man or woman who has not learnt how to control his / her temper should not bother going into marriage otherwise such a marriage will collapse in no time. There is nothing like a problem-free marriage. A man or woman who has not learnt how to control his/her spending is not ready for marriage. Do not say he/she will change when marriage happens. A lot of families are leaving in abject poverty because both parents did not set their priorities straight. So make sure to understand him/her in the area of spending. In fact, **what is his/her priority list like?**   ·        **ACCEPTANCE.** This has become one of the greatest problems in marriage. You must have found out that your husband/wife loves to keep late-night even before marriage but you did not make up your mind to accept it rather you were living in the lie that he/she will change after marriage. I tell you 95% of what your spouse was exhibiting before marriage is what he/she will still be after marriage because you never complained about it and so he/she took it that you are okay with his/her shortcomings, why then do you think you can change him/her?   ·        **RESPECT.** This is a very vital point in marriage. Respecting your spouse will always make them feel comfortable because they know that even if they mess up in public, you will not embarrass them in the public. Another angle to respect is on the area of individual differences. Remember that both of you came from a different world, so there should be a great deal of balance in the area of respecting each other’s opinion.   ·        **ROMANCE.** This is where most marriages start crashing. The moment the man stops seeing anything romantic and lovable about his wife, the tendency of seeing it outside becomes greater. This is also applicable to the wife. Remember that love cannot be seen or touched but it can only be felt and also be expressed based on romance. Living a romantic married life should be the prayer of every married and unmarried individual. Always be ready to show your spouse how much you love them with your gifts, kind words and actions.   ·        **INTERACTION.** Communication as we all know is the foundation for a good relationship. The moment he/she stops communicating, it is a clear sign that all is not well. Do not be too quick to conclude without making an effort to hear his/her side of the story. Remember, there is a healthy and unhealthy form of communication. For communication to be healthy, both parties must be able to have an open mind towards each other point of view. Always interact with your spouse especially when the tension is high. Do not leave each other in silence because silence can breed a lot of assumption which may lead to doubt.   ·        **AGREEMENT.** This is simple but hard to do. Whenever there is a misunderstanding, always have it at the back of your mind that you must come to a positive agreement. This will always make you shift grounds even when you should not just for you to reach an agreement. When there is a high level of agreement in a marriage, there will be a great deal of progress.   ·        **GOODWILL.** In your hearts, let goodwill for one another always flow. When you are always working towards your spouse goodwill, you will be adding more life to him/her without knowing. This will make you remember to buy a bouquet of flower, cloth or even a pair of shoe for him/her whenever you see something nice out there. Whenever goodwill flows, love becomes stronger. You will never allow your spouse to get swallowed up by the struggles of life. Let goodwill flow from your hearts. ·        **ENDURANCE.** This is one area a lot of people will not like to hear or even talk about. During the exchange of vows, you promised each other in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, in good times and in bad times and finally, you said till death do us apart. Why do you now wish to run away when things become bad? Endurance in marriage is as important as marriage itself. Before getting into marriage, you must understand that marriage is not always sweet. There must be bad times and good times so why not stay and endure to the end. Endurance is so hard to keep to in marriage but when you allow it to take over your situation, you will one day be thankful for not leaving your marriage. Remember you said **till death do us part.**   **Hope this article helps someone to live a good married life.**   Article first published by me in uptrennd. https://www.uptrennd.com/post-detail/marriage-and-you~NzgwMjE2