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Golden rules for living as a couple. They cannot be absent. (EN)

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Avatar for Dani01
Written by   46
2 months ago

A happy couple is a perfect union, its members must face or argue and problems just like those that fail. But while some are victorious, the others fail to stay afloat. Understanding what makes a relationship work or fail is essential or the time to rescue it.

1. Improve the map of love

The map of love is that part of the mind where we keep relevant information about the life of our partner. If we have a poor or wrong map, our chances of success are slim. An emotionally intelligent couple knows and knows how to function in the world of their partner. This map is made from the knowledge of your partner's dreams, wishes and hopes. Likewise, his religious ideas, his friends and the things that irritate him or make him happy have a place in him.

2-Affection and admiration

If a couple loses affection and admiration for each other, the relationship cannot be rekindled. In 94% of cases, couples who look positively at the history of their relationship have a high probability of success.

By remembering the qualities of the partner it is more difficult to get upset when it is argued.

Strive to remember the things you like about your partner, their accomplishments and triumphs, the reason they got married. Try to show love in all its forms. Sometimes we are so immersed in other matters that we forget to spend time lavishing affection on each other.

3.- Approaching the other

Conversations as trivial as commenting on the news in the newspaper or wondering if it is necessary to buy more bread, are key when it comes to keeping the couple together. When a relationship doesn't work out, these moments of connection are very rare. In this last example, the usual thing is that he or she does not look up from the newspaper, or that when faced with a daily question, the other does not feel involved. Many people believe that the secret is in a candlelight dinner on a vacation at sea, but the real secret is getting closer to each other, in the little things in life.

Do things together, like watching TV or shopping. Do not take for granted that you know all the details of each other, ask each other their opinions on anything, Plan activities that can be born Together. Share some interests.

Remember that when communication breaks down, the four horsemen appear: criticism, contempt, defensive attitude and lastly, an evasive attitude towards relationship problems. This leads us to distance ourselves from the couple and their conflicts.

4- Letting yourself be influenced by your partner

Entering the other's world is the way to delve into the map of love, enhance affection and get closer; the next step is to accept the influence. Women, more experienced in the world of emotions, have an advantage in this regard, but more and more, men are learning to make their way in this regard and enter the world of their partner and their children. The result is not long in coming:

When a man accepts the influence of his wife, the relationship improves and the friendship is strengthened.

One of the best ways to make decisions as a couple is by arguing taking the best of each proposal, without ruling out any opinion beforehand. This is how you learn to give ground without your self-esteem suffering. But, this must always be done showing the utmost respect for the other. It is not good that it is only one who makes the important decisions.

5.- Solve the problems

Many couples screw it up when they try to persuade each other. In this way, a fight that could have been productive ends up screaming. If you are in this situation and believe that the problem has a solution, then the key is to learn a new conflict resolution technique.

6.-Get out of the stalemate

Sometimes, solving the conflict is a long-term objective and the urgent thing is to move from stalemate to dialogue. It is necessary to understand the cause of the problem, be it transcendental or trivial, even if the conflict persists, at least they will be able to talk about it without hurting themselves. Thinking that this situation reflects that their aspirations are not being realized or that they do not respect those of the other. A happy couple helps the other to realize their dreams.

7.-Feeling transcendent

The couple relationship does not consist of sharing a house, raising children and making love, but rather has a spiritual dimension that refers to the creation of a common inner life. That does not mean that they agree on everything, in fact, the relationship can work even when they have different dreams, but for the life of a couple to work, the spouses must be able to create their own culture, with rituals that allow them connect emotionally, rituals as simple as hiking on holidays or cooking or having fun together, are valid.

The test (Data to think about it)

  • Half of all divorces occur during the first 7 years of living together.

  • One of the saddest reasons a relationship fails is that neither spouse recognizes its value until it is too late.

  • An unhappy marriage increases the chances of falling ill by 35%. People who maintain a happy relationship, live longer and enjoy better health.

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Avatar for Dani01
Written by   46
2 months ago
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Your said it correctly, being emotionally available for our spouse is what make the relationship smooth. Your tips are helpful.

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