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The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck

10 31
Avatar for CrazyRichFilipina
Written by   197
9 months ago
Topics: Book, Books, Self-help

"The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck" is a self-help book written by Mark Manson. I had an urge to give this book a try because it is a well-known book on the internet and everyone keeps on suggesting it. I personally don't like self-help books that much because they are kind of boring because I find them common sense. But I still wanted to give this a try and what I did is instead of reading the book, I listened through the audiobook version instead that is available for free in Google Podcast or Spotify. I knew that if I read the book, I will not finish it and just feel sleepy so I opted for the other option. Listening to the audiobook version was nice. I did my plates while listening to it and I successfully finished it.

What is it all about?

The book is a reaction to the self-help industry and what Manson saw as a culture of mindless positivity that is not practical or helpful for most people. Manson uses many of his own personal experiences to illustrate how life's struggles often give it more meaning, which, he argues, is a better approach than constantly trying to be happy. Manson's approach and writing style have been categorized by some as contrarian to the general self-help industry, using blunt honesty and profanity to illustrate his ideas.

The book walks me through the nine great chapters:

  1. Don't Try.

  2. Happiness is a problem.

  3. You are not special.

  4. The value of suffering.

  5. You are always choosing.

  6. You are wrong about everything (But so am I).

  7. Failure is the way forward.

  8. The importance of saying no.

  9. And then you die.

My Takeaways from the Book

1. Embrace the uncomfortable

The author implies that suffering is inevitable in our life. There is no such thing as a perfect life because everyone experience different sorts of problem, may it be the wealthiest or most beautiful or sexiest people. You embrace the uncomfortable by pursuing something negative that generates positive.

Examples for this are: The pain in a gym, gives you energy. Failure at a test gives you more understandings and how to improve them in the future. Overcoming challenges and fears allows you to build courage.

The thing is that in our life, problems never stop, they just merely get exchanged or upgraded. Happiness results from solving these problems.

"Everything worthwhile in life is won through surmounting the associated negative experience."

2. Life Goals

Don't ask "What do I want out of life?". Instead ask "What pain do I want in my life?" or "What am I willing to struggle for?"

Example: People want amazing body, but you will only get there with willingness endure dedication at gym and by eating healthy. As for me, I am willing to struggle 5 years in studying Architecture in order for me to became an Architect. I am willing to be frugal, in order to attain financial freedom.

It is the same to number 1, embrace the uncomfortable. Embrace challenges and failures.

"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful."

"If you are unwilling to fail, you are unwilling to succeed."

3. Choose your values carefully.

By what standard do you measure yourself?

Example:

  • Good Values - honesty, innovation, self-respect, curiosity, humility, creativity

  • Bad Values - feeling good all the time, dominance through manipulation, being the center of attention, not being alone, being liked by everybody, being a gunner/competitive and bring others down in order to get ahead.

As for me, my values are faith, kindness, creativity, knowledge, sustainability, gratitude, and freedom.

In assessing what your values are, it let you focuses on your priorities.

Better values >Better problems > Better life

4. Take responsibility

Accept responsibility.

Example: This sucks but its my responsibility. I got this.

Responsibility (present tense) is not equal to fault (past tense).

Hold yourself accountable for your behaviour.

Eliminate blame and excuses.

Ask yourself, "what can I do now?" rather than "Why did this happen to me?"

5. Define your goals wisely

Best for short terms: Graduate, buy house, have a good body.

"No pain, no gain." Our proudest achievements come in the face of the greatest adversity.

In setting our goals, it should be like these instead:

Study for 4 years in college, in order to get my college degree.

Live below my means, in order to achieve financial freedom.

6. Remember, you will die

Keeping death in mind taught to appreciate life more and remain humble.

Closing thoughts

For me, I can summarize this book with this quote:

"Everyone gives a fuck about something, choose wisely what those things are."

Our world has so much noise nowadays, most of it is because of the internet. People are sharing their beautiful lives from one social media platform to another, there's so much opportunities popping up, too many advertisements coming out of nowhere, a lots of influencers, and so much more. Most of the time, it is really overwhelming.

Well, what this book taught me is to is to list down the things that are important to you and what you want to give a f*ck, focus on the things those, never mind about what's not in there.

For example, the things I give a f*ck are God, my family and my close friends, my studies, financial freedom, travel, and overall health.

In being specific of the things that are important for me, I don't have to think of pleasing other people or other things that are not align to my priorities.

If you have read this already, please let me know. If you haven't yet, do you have plans to read it anytime soon?

As always, thank you for reading! 🥰

Special thanks to @Pichi28, @emily2u, @Jane, @Eylz2021 @MizLhaine, @carisdaneym2, @FarmGirl , and @OfficialGamboaLikeUs for showing their extreme support to me through sponsorships. So grateful for each one of you! ❤️


Reference:

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck - Wikipedia


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Date Published: October 28, 2021

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Written by   197
9 months ago
Topics: Book, Books, Self-help
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Comments

Grabe yung title haha. Pro d ko pa nabasa

$ 0.01
9 months ago

Ganyan talaga yung title nya hahaha.

$ 0.00
9 months ago

Woah. Mahilig ka din pala magbasa ng libro parang gusto ko din bumili na ng mga ganyan para di lang dito ako nagbabasa haha 😂

$ 0.01
9 months ago

Sakto lang sis, sobrang dalang lang actually tsaka depende sa mood hahaha.

$ 0.00
9 months ago

WELCOME BAACCCKKK.

What am I willing to struggle for?

I’m willing to struggle going out in my comfort zone just to fulfill my parents needs. I’m willing to stay away from the comfort zone where I am from to support them.

$ 0.01
9 months ago

Thankie!

You're such a good daughter and a selfless person. Your parents are lucky to have you! <3

$ 0.00
9 months ago

This book has been on my cart for a long time already. Probably 2 months or so 😆

What am I willing to struggle for? That's a nice motivating question. ❤

$ 0.01
9 months ago

2 months is too long already haha. It is indeed a nice question to keep ourselves going :)

$ 0.00
9 months ago

Damn, I wanna read this book. I think it is $20 in Lazada the last time I check. I want to physical book! Might find it online too.😍

$ 0.01
9 months ago

Yeah, it is available anywhere online. I don't have money for it though so I just opted for free audiobook.

$ 0.00
9 months ago