@ChristinaMadart 5 July 2021 more from that month

Hello dear noise friends! I have had a diverse three days in regards to feelings and events. Had an awesome weekend for the Ninjutsu camp that I shared with you, but today my grandmother (my father's mother) left us.. 😔 She had a bad fall, broke her hip, her heart couldn't take it and she died in her sleep in the hospital. She was quite old (94 years old) and had a very nice life, except from the past five years that her health issues were not allowing her to do everything she wanted. All her life she was hyperactive, always obsessed with cleaning and doing the house work, providing to others (even when they didn't want it) and giving. She also had her bad traits coming from a generation that had such a different point of view and upbringing than ours, a totally different wordview. We had our fall outs sometimes, but we loved each other deeply. When I first heard it I took some time before it was able to register. My grandmother was one of the people that I couldn't picture dying, I don't know why. I then had my freak out and after that I passed to a state of feeling numb about the fact and couldn't cry more since then. The worst part about someone dying is that you have to accept that you're never going to be able to see them again. Thankfully I have visited her recently and I wasn't left with the feeling that I didn't see her before she passed, but I wish that I would have hugged her and kept her in my arms like I used to do the other times. I didn't do it out of fear for the latest mutation of covid, the delta, I thought that I shouldn't. I held her hands in mine though as long as I was there. During my last visits on June she was more afraid and frail than she used to be, used to cry and complain a lot and during the last three weeks she was constantly repeating the same questions and sentences again and again. I was at the funeral today and I had this weird feeling when I was looking at her body lying still, with no life in it. Covered by white flowers, calm and unresponsive. Made me return to my thoughts about the soul, what happens when it separates from the body and how astonishing and awe bringing is this connection. I still feel numb about the fact and all these came out from me without having planned to do a post, I don't use to post about such events. Especially on traditional social media like Facebook, I would never do it. But this one here has inspired something special to me. I don't know personally almost no one of you, but I feel many of you as friends. Virtual ones at the moment, but near to me and my energy. That's all for now, I will go to sleep, call it a day and cool my mind and I'll be back tomorrow. Apologies for not having answered to your last days' comments, will do as soon as I get my schedule back on normal. Goodnight from Greece! 🌑🧡