@Charlotte 2 December 2021 more from that month

The noise keeps you alive. The frustrations and pain means you're not numb. Failed decisions doesn't make you dumb, It builds you to be a better human. ~ I am angry inside I have a lot of things to say. Things to complain. I'm too tired to keep on absorbing all the stress around me. People always told me I am always frowning, it's because I spent too much energy from keeping all the frustrations around me. I don't want to confront those people giving such stress because I don't want trouble- so I let myself suffer. I always think that, they are all having a hard time more than myself. They are more frustrated more than I am. With that, I can calm myself. But, sometimes it haunt me. All those suppressed feelings, all those unheard rants, all those unrelieved stress start to eat me alive. I'm not depressed, I know where all these sadness are coming from, it's just that it's too hard to handle at times. I don't want to be mad at anyone but they are being too much, they're causing tons of trouble to me. I don't want to be angry at them so I end up getting mad at myself. I don't have any complain babysitting my niece and nephew, but sometimes they add to my frustrations- I mean not actually those kids, but their parents, it's hard to explain. Sasabihan ka na lagi ka nalang bilis magalit, kung ikaw araw araw pa alagain ng makulit na mga bata na hindi naman sayo habang nag aaral ka, tapos gawaing bahay pa, tapos hindi naman nag aayos ugali ng mga magulang, tignan ko lang kung di ka mainis ka agad. Sobrang pasensya na binibigay ko buong araw, wala ng natitira pag gabi, kaya pag umuuwi sila tsaka nila nakikita masungit kong ugali. Masisisi ba ko? Sorry po sa rant. **PLEASE please don't comment stuff like "ako nga,, pero kaya ko.." or comments that will invalidate what I feel, because we have our own level of sensitivity. I also stated that, I always think that someone's problems are worst than mine so please think the same if you can't, just ignore this post. I just really, badly need to let this go.