Socially Intelligent People

0 11
Avatar for Alihamza
1 year ago

While you may not understand what constitutes social intelligence, you have almost certainly encountered social tone deafness that leaves you annoyed at best and physically uncomfortable at worst. Culture and social intelligence go hand in hand. However, it appears that conventional "politeness" is starting to lose its allure because it can evoke notions of erasing your identity in favor of more standardized behavior. We want to be able to interact with others in a way that is comfortable for both of us, but genuine emotion shouldn't have to be sacrificed in favor of a courteous nod or grin. The two do not preclude one another. Socially knowledgeable people think and act in ways that go beyond what is currently considered to be acceptable culture. This, of course, is the basis of connection, the thing on which our brains are wired to desire, and on which we personally thrive. Here, the core traits of someone who is socially intelligent:

01.   They avoid attempting to evoke an intense emotional reaction from whomever they are conversing with. They don't talk in a way that exaggerates their struggles or magnifies their triumphs in order to elicit admiration or pity. This typically happens when the subject at hand does not genuinely call for such a strong response, which causes discomfort for others since they feel under pressure to feign an emotional response.

 

02.   They avoid making general statements about people, politics, or beliefs. Saying "This concept is erroneous" is the quickest way to come across as illiterate. (Though it may be incorrect for you, that notion still persists since it is accurate for someone else.)  Intelligent people say, “I don’t personally understand this idea or agree with it.” To speak definitively about any one person or idea is to be blind to the multitude of perspectives that exist on it. It is the definition of closed-minded and short[1]sightedness.

03.   They don't quickly reject criticism or respond to it so emotionally that they become immutable or unapproachable. Some of the hardest people to be in relationships with are those who feel so scared by even the tiniest criticism of their actions as being harmful that they really wind up becoming enraged at the person making the criticism, reinforcing the issue as a whole. People with social intelligence evaluate their response before reacting emotionally; otherwise, the reaction is just defensiveness.

04.   They don't mistakenly believe that their view of someone is factual information about them. He's a prick is not something that socially astute individuals state as fact. "I had a poor experience with him," they remark instead.

05.   They never generalize about other people based on their actions. They never use the phrases "you always" or "you never" to make a point. Additionally, they base their arguments on sentences that start with "I feel" rather than "you are." They do this because using language that people don't perceive as intimidating is the best method to persuade them to listen to you out and truly start the conversation that will result in the change you want.

06.   They use precise language. Without evading the subject, they speak what they mean to say. They communicate clearly, concisely, and calmly. Instead, then just waiting for people to respond, they concentrate on communicating something.

07.   They listen without offering a response. When listening to others speak, they concentrate on what is being said rather than how they will respond. The meta-practice of "holding space" is another name for this.

1
$ 0.00
Avatar for Alihamza
1 year ago

Comments