I Cried Today.
For a few days now I have not been enjoying my relationship like I used to. my boyfriend has not been acting and it's got me wondering what could have happened. I remember clearly a few days ago when he complained to me that he has no money on him. Honestly, I can feel his pain. I know how it feels when there's no money on you. The same thing applies to me. Whenever I am broke, I begin to get angry unnecessarily because I don't have money to meet my financial needs at that moment and it gets me mad. Here, we are talking about a grown-up man that needs money to take care of himself and we all know that the pressure is always on men and is less when it comes to women.
One thing about everybody is that we all address issues in different ways. Presently my mind does not want to talk to anyone. He just want to be alone. I totally understand the feeling but it is affecting me already. I feel sad that is not creating time for me. this has been happening for over four days now and I'm trying to take a chill but I can't do that any longer. I miss him and I want to talk to him but he's not available. I am very sure that is trying to make ends meet but it's just so painful that I am not getting attention from my favourite person at the moment which I know things will go back to normal in a few days from now.
This afternoon I text him and kept on nagging in his DM. While doing that, I was very angry and crying at the same time. I cried till my eyes became red. I didn't reply my text because I was not online so I called him but he did not pick up my call. Then he came online to tell me that I'm supposed to understand him because he has never been like this. he said he has not been talking to anybody and that really got me annoyed that my boyfriend is classifying me as anybody. It made me cry over again then I decided to text one of my male friends. I had to take screenshots of our chats and showed the guy.
The guy asked me to come down because he could tell that my man is really having some difficulties presently and I am not supposed to be nagging. All I was supposed to do is calm him down since he already explained fully to me why he has not been acting like he used to be. I had to go back to the text to read it again. I took my time reading it and I realised that I was not supposed to nag at him.
I felt loved again and I promised myself not to ever do that to him again. Whenever he is down, I promise to be his strength 🙂.